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AND NOW... MONTY PYTHON SINGS |
Monty Python's World of Music |
Wejdź na Modrzew | Skocz na Film | Droga do Piosenki | Abecadło | ![]() |
Composer: Eric Idle, John Du Prez all about? Is God really real, or is there some doubt? Well tonight, we're going to sort it all out, For tonight it's the Meaning of Life. What's the point of all this hoax? Is it the "chicken and the egg" time, are we just yolks? Or perhaps we're just one of God's little jokes, Well ca c'est the Meaning of Life. Is life just a game where we make up the rules, While we're searching for something to say, Or are we just simply spiraling coils, Of self-replicating DNA? In this life, What is our fate? Is there a Heaven and Hell? Do we reincarnate? Is mankind evolving or is it too late? Well tonight, here's the Meaning of Life. For millions, this life is a sad vale of tears, Sitting round with nothing to say, While the scientists say we're just simply spiraling coils, Of self-replicating DNA. So just why, why are we here? And just what, what, what, what do we fear? Well ce soir, for a change, it will all be made clear, For this is the Meaning of Life - c'est le sens de la vie, This is the Meaning of Life Composer: David Howman, Andre Jacquemin DAD: There are Buddists, There are Hindus and Mormons and then, There are those that follow Mohammad, but I've never been one of them... I'm a Roman Catholic, And have been since before I was born, And the one thing they say about Catholics, Is they'll take you as soon as you're warm... You don't have to be a six footer, You don't have to have a great brain, You don't have to have any clothes on - You're a Catholic the moment Dad came... Because... Every sperm is sacred, Every sperm is great, If a sperm is wasted, God gets quite irate. Every sperm is sacred, Every sperm is great, If a sperm is wasted, God gets quite irate. On the dusty ground, God shall make them pay for, each sperm that can't be found. Every sperm is good, Every sperm is needed, In your neighbourhood. Spill theirs just anywhere, But God loves those who treat their Semen with more care. MEN NEIGHBOURS: Every sperm is great, WOMEN NEIGHBOURS: PRIEST: BRIDE AND GROOM: NANNIES: CARDINALS: CHILDREN: Every sperm is fine. FIRST MOURNER: O'er mountain, hill and plain. STATUES: Each sperm that's spilt in vain. EVERYBODY: Every sperm is great, If a sperm is wasted, God gets quite irate. Every sperm is wanted, Every sperm is good, Every sperm is needed, In your neighbourhood. Composer: Eric Idle, John Du Prez Don't grill or toast Your flock. Don't put us on the barbecue Or simmer us in stock. Don't braise or bake or boil us Or stir-fry us in a wok. Oh, please don't lightly poach us Or baste us with hot fat. Don't fricassee or roast us Or boil us in a vat, And please don't stick Thy servants, Lord, In a Rotissomat. Composer: Eric Idle, John Du Prez Mrs. Brown, and things seem hard or tough, and people are stupid, obnoxious or daft and you feel that you've had quite eno-o-o-o-o-ough. Just remember that you're standing on a planet that's evolving, And revolving at nine hundred miles an hour, It's orbiting at nineteen miles a second, so it's reckoned, A sun that is the source of all our power. The sun and you and me and all the stars that we can see, Are moving at a million miles a day In the outer spiral arm, at fourty thousand miles an hour, Of the Galaxy we call the Milky Way. Our galaxy itself contains a hundred billion stars It's a hundred thousand light years side to side, It bulges in the middle sixteen thousand light years thick But out by us it's just three thousand light years wide We're thirty thousand light years from galactic central point, We go round every two hundred million years And our galaxy is only one of millions of billions In this amazing and expanding Universe. The universe itself keeps on expanding and expanding In all of the directions it can whizz As fast as it can go, at the speed of light you know, Twelve million miles a minute, and that's the fastest speed there is. So remember when you're feeling very small and insecure How amazingly unlikely is your birth And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere up in space 'Cause there's bugger all down here on Earth. (The not Noel Coward song) Composer: Eric Idle ladies and gentlemen. Here's a little number I tossed off recently in the Caribbean. Isn't it awfully nice to have a penis? Isn't it frightfully good to have a dong? It's swell to have a stiffy, It's divine to own a dick, From the tiniest little tadger, To the world's biggest prick. So three cheers for your Willy or John Thomas, Hooray for your one-eyed trouser snake, Your piece of pork, your wife's best friend, Your Percy or your cock, You can wrap it up in ribbons. You can slip it in your sock, But don't take it out in public, Or they will stick you in the dock, And you won't come back. Oh, thank you very much. Composer: Eric Idle ladies and gentlemen. It's truly a real honourable experience to be here this evening, a very wonderful and warm and emotional moment for all of us. And I'd like to sing a song for all... of you. It's Christmas in Heaven, All the children sing, It's Christmas in Heaven. Hark hark those church bells ring. It's Christmas in Heaven. The snow falls from the sky, But it's nice and warm, and everyone Looks smart and wears a tie. It's Christmas in Heaven. There's great films on TV... "The Sound of Music" twice an hour And "Jaws" One, Two and Three. There's gifts for all the family, There's toiletries and trains... There's Sony Walkman Headphone sets And the latest video games! It's Christmas, It's Christmas in Heaven, Hip hip hip hip hip hooray, Every single day Is Christmas day! It's Christmas, It's Christmas in Heaven, Hip hip hip hip hip hooray, Every single day Is Christmas day. Design: Ireneusz Siwek |
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