MONTY PYTHON'S MODRZEW - Another Monty Python Record: Gumby Theatre, etc.

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     AND NOW...
     PŁYTY i TAŚMY
     MONTY  PYTHONA

Another Monty Python Record - 1971

GUMBY THEATRE, ETC.

FIRST MAN Michael Palin
SECOND MAN John Cleese
ANNOUNCER Eric Idle
L.D. GUMBY Michael Palin
M.J. GUMBY John Cleese
R.S. GUMBY Eric Idle

(sound of telephone ringing; the phone is answered)

FIRST MAN
Hello I am just listening to this record with my wife and our au-pair and I'd like to say how shocked we are that a pleasant collection of Norwegian folk songs should be turned into an excuse for communist propaganda of the shoddiest kind. What's gone wrong with the world. I can't even take a bath without six or seven communists jumping in with me. They're in my shirt cupboard and Breshnev and Kosegan are in the kitchen now eating my wife's jam. Oh they are cutting off my legs. I can see them peeping out of my wife's blouse. Why doesn't Mr Maulding do something about it before it is to late. Ohhhh... God...

(sound of Telephone being hung up)

SECOND MAN
And several butchers' aprons. The next groove on this record has been electronically engineered by some of the world's finest craftsman to bring to your homes the full glorious spectacle of Gumby Theatre.

(fanfare music followed by hand clapping)

ANNOUNCER
Gumby Theatre comes live tonight from the Yvonne Gumby Theatre near Guilford. L.D. Gumby, M.J. Gumby and R.S. Gumby star in the Cherry Orchard by Anton Checkov. The action takes place near Moscow in the 1870's.

(sound of birds singing and then knock on door)

L.D. GUMBY
Come in!

(sound of someone crashing through the door)

Oh, open the door and come in!

M.J. GUMBY
Sorry...

L.D. GUMBY
Hello!

R.S. GUMBY
Sorry!

L.D. GUMBY
Shut up!

M.J. GUMBY
I've got my head stuck in the cupboard!

R.S. GUMBY
Sorry!

L.D. GUMBY
Shut up!

M.J. GUMBY
I can't see anything!

L.D. GUMBY
Hello!

M.J. GUMBY
I can't see anything!

M.J. GUMBY
Hello!

R.S. GUMBY
Shut up, Mr Gumby!

(sound of glass breaking)

M.J. GUMBY
Ohhhh... my brain hurts!

L.D. GUMBY
Shut up!

M.J. GUMBY
Sorry!

R.S. GUMBY
Ooohhhhhh...

ANNOUNCER
Meanwhile in St Petersburg Illya Nataevska and Mariana Plaentkoff await news of their step-brother Troffemoff...

L.D. GUMBY
Hello!

(sound of more glass breaking)

Oh I have broken it!

M.J. GUMBY
Get off my foot!

L.D. GUMBY
Shut up!

M.J. GUMBY
Sorry, my brain hurts! My Brain hurts!

(sound of more glass breaking and then sound of music)

ANNOUNCER
That was the Cherry Orchard by Anton Chekov adapted for radio by putting onto a piece of wood and banging a few nails through it. Mr L.M. Gumby is now appearing in the Thames near Whopping Step and Mr D.P Gumby is appearing as a central tunnel support on the new Victoria line. And now Book at Bedtime read by L.D. Gumby.

L.D. GUMBY
Oh, I hit my head on the table!

M.J. GUMBY
Oh, shut up!

L.D. GUMBY
Sorry!

M.J. GUMBY
Oh I have a piece of brain stuck in my head... oh my head hurts!

continue

Design: Ireneusz Siwek