MONTY PYTHON'S MODRZEW - French Lecture on Sheep-aircraft

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     MONTY PYTHON'S
     FLYING CIRCUS

Monty Python's Flying Circus - Series one / Episode 2 "Sex and violence"

French Lecture on Sheep-aircraft

FIRST FRENCHMAN John Cleese
SECOND FRENCHMAN Michael Palin
FIRST PEPPERPOT Graham Chapman
SECOND PEPPERPOT Terry Jones
THIRD PEPPERPOT Michael Plain
FOURTH PEPPERPOT John Cleese

(Two Frenchmen stand in front of a diagram of a sheep adapted for flying. They speak rapidly in French, much of it pseudo.)

FIRST FRENCHMAN
Bonsoir - ici nous avons les diagrammes modernes d'un mouton anglo-français ... maintenant ... baa-aa, baa-aa... nous avons, dans la tete, le cabinc. Ici, on se trouve le petit capitaine Anglais, Monsieur Trubshawe.

SECOND FRENCHMAN
Vive Brian, wherever you are.

FIRST FRENCHMAN
D'accord, d'accord. Maintenant, je vous présente mon collegue, le pour célebre, Jean-Brian Zatapathique.

(Transfers his moustache to Second Frenchman)

SECOND FRENCHMAN
Maintenant, le mouton ... le landing ... les wheels, bon.

(Opens diagram to show wheels on sheep's legs.)

FIRST FRENCHMAN
Bon, les wheels, ici.

SECOND FRENCHMAN
C'est formidable, n'est ce pas...

(unintelligibly indicates motor at rear of sheep)

FIRST FRENCHMAN
Les voyageurs ... les bagages ... ils sont ... ici!

(Triumphantly opens the rest of the diagram to reveal the whole brilliant arrangement. They run round flapping their arms and baa-ing. Cut to pepperpots in supermarket with off-screen interviewer.)

FIRST PEPPERPOT
Oh yes, we get a lot of French people round here.
SECOND PEPPERPOT
Ooh Yes.

THIRD PEPPERPOT
All over yes.

INTERVIEWER
And how do you get on with these French people?

FIRST PEPPERPOT
Oh very well.

FOURTH PEPPERPOT
So do I.

THIRD PEPPERPOT
Me too.

FIRST PEPPERPOT
Oh yes 1 like them. I mean, they think well don't they? I mean, be fair- Pascal.

SECOND PEPPERPOT
Blaise Pascal.

THIRD PEPPERPOT
Jean-Paul Sartre.

FIRST PEPPERPOT
Yes, Voltaire.

SECOND PEPPERPOT
Ooh! - Rene Descartes.

(Rene Descartes is sitting thinking. Bubbles come from his head with 'thinks '. Suddenly he looks happy. In a thought bubble appears 'I THINK THEREFORE I AM '. A large hand comes into picture with a pin and pricks the thought bubble. It deflates and disappears. After a second, Rene disappears too.)

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